Misanthropy

I would definitley classify myself as a misanthrope. I don't hint to it much, but I often find myself thinking about how I dislike human society (almost to the point of hatred). I don't and can't understand why some things are the way they are. Why people are so unnecessarily cruel to each other, in both death and life. Politics is a foreign concept to me. It seems so useless. Religion is also so foreign. I could do without it. Too many rules and stipulations...not enough focus on the spirituality. The hypocrisy itself is worthy of it's own blog entry.

As much as I try to understand why people do the things they do sometimes, I just can't. It's an impossible task for me. Why is it okay for people to believe in conflicting ideas? Why is it okay for non-human animals to eat meat, but somehow morally wrong for a human to eat it? Why is it okay for republicans to say something and have it go unnoticed, but if a democrat says the same thing, the republicans get upset about it? Why do people care if others aren't of the same religion as themselves? I could fill this entire entry up with questions I deem important, but that would take so long. I'd love to just ask them to people. Just go up to someone who's very religious and ask them why they would care if I got into heaven or not. Or go up to a pro-life person and ask whether they believe if the mother's life was in danger if she should give up her life for a being that may or may not live and also if they cared for the life of those who were of adult age.

For me, I'll just accept the fact that human society makes no sense and that I'll never feel okay with being a part of it.

A part of my misanthropy comes from feeling not completely human. Whether it's therianthropy or something else I'm not sure. It's something I'm still exploring. All I know is that a part of me doesn't feel 100% human so it gives me a very awkward and perhaps skewed view of humanity. Had I the chance to choose what I wanted to be born as, I definitely would not have chosen human.

But to walk around with this feeling of contempt for what I am is so strange yet normal at the same time. I'm so used to feeling terrible about humanity. But it seems the more I see of the world and how people act towards each other, the stronger that contempt grows. It's impossible at my age to ignore the politics of the world. It's impossible to ignore the hate spewed by supposed "Christians". It's impossible to ignore the bigotry out there. All I can do is deal with it.